Preschool Humor

Children say the funniest things without even trying!  

Preschool humor helps us to realize just how concrete their thinking can be!

It also helps us realize why we love this age group so much!

What they say usually catches us off guard!  

Parents- hold on to your children's stories!  They will love hearing them later in life!  

And teachers, be sure to share the humor of your preschool children with their parents- they'll love it!

2 Going on 13!

Teaching 2 year olds can be very demanding and very challenging!

As we were sitting down for our lunch, one of my girls said, "Teacher, I am not hungry."

I replied, "My angel, you have to eat.  If you don't eat, don't come to me later and tell me you are hungry, because there will be no food left.  Your friends will have eaten it all."

She looked at me and then looked at her friends.  She then placed her hands on her hips, looked at me, rolled her eyes and calmly said "Fine, see if I care".

Submitted by Sharona of Johannesburg, gauteng

These Kids...!

My preschoolers were at table working on a project.  They were quite noisy and were doing more talking than project.  The youngest, a 2 year old girl, suddenly slid back in her chair, tipped her head back, looking at the ceiling and then me, she said "These kids are driving me crazy!"   I laughed out loud, then quieted the kids and got them back to task.

Submitted by Karen of Phoenix, AZ

Bounce Houses......in Heaven?

Conversation between two brothers, ages 4 and 6.

6 yr old: "I know when Jesus' Birthday is."

4 yr old: "When?"

6 yr old: "December 25th, Christmas Day."

4 yr old: "Cool! Is he going to have a bounce house?"

I still laugh till this day.

Submitted by Mrs. Brown, San Antonio, Tx

Who Do You Trust?

We were outside one day and one of my younger students was kicking her leg back and forth. She got really close to a classmate. I said, "You need to be careful." She said, "Why?" I explained that her friend was close and she might accidentally hurt him. Her response? "It's ok, Ms. Rachel. I trust myself." My co-teacher and I still laugh when we talk about it!

Submitted by Rachel in Indianapolis, IN

Awww...cute!

Even though this happened many many years ago, I still think about this often.  When we would sit for circle time the children always liked to sit on the teachers laps who were not leading circle time.  It always seemed this one little boy would always pick me.  He would hurry to me and smile and sit down.  When he was asked by another child as to why you always sit on Miss Karen's lap his answer was this  "She is fluffy and soft just like a pillow."  That was the best line I had ever heard about my weight.  It made me smile and still does.

Submitted by Karen from Algoma, WI

Get a Job!!

I was talking to my Pre-K class about them forgetting to put the tops back on the markers. I reminded them that the markers would dry up and we wouldn't have any more if that happened. I said, "I just don't have enough money to replace them if you don't take care of them." One of my little ones looked up at me so sincere and said, "Well, Mrs. Beam you could get a job." Baahaaaaaa. The best one I have heard in 18 years of teaching.

Submitted by Darlene

Well, it's still 2 syllables!

One of my colleagues has a girl in her class who talks incessantly. One day my colleague started to address this child as "Miss Chatterbox", until this little girl asked her "Teacher, why do you call me Miss Coolerbox?"

Naomi, Carletonville, Gauteng

Old McDonald goes fast food!

It was circle time and we were singing Old McDonald had a farm and on the farm he had .... one of the children said he had chicken nuggets.

All we could do was laugh.

Pauline Wise, Atlanta, Georgia

What in the fruit 'n cockin' is that??!

Once during snack time right after nap, the children were having fruit cocktail. After one little boy finished his, he asked, "Ms. Robbie, can I have some fruit-n cockin?". Needless to say, I laughed for a while and even though this happened years ago, I still laugh at the thought of it today.

Robbie, St. Louis, MO

What is FOG?

Our mornings here in Australia have been cold and frosty for over 3 weeks and this morning we had the added blessing of thick "pea soup" fog.

As the children ate their morning tea(snack), conversation turned to how thick the fog still was.  I asked the children 

"I've heard many times that this morning's fog is as thick as pea soup. What do you suppose fog REALLY is?" 

One child said it looked like steam.  A few more said smoke. There was a bit of head nodding in agreement and much discussion.  One of our nearly 5 year olds said "But fog isn't hot like steam or smoke is".

As they all sat pondering, one of our 3 year olds jumped from her seat and excitedly shouted out "I know!  I know! Fog's a melted cloud!"

My heart melted too!

Deborah, Amaroo-Australian Capital Territory, Australia

Frozen Ice

5 year old:  Mom, I need some frozen ice in my water. 

Mom: As opposed to what kind of ice?

5 year old:  Ok, I'll just take some really cold ice.

Sherrita, Omaha, NE

Kids are....animals??

 I was in the 3 year old class.  The kids seemed a little excited and we were trying to calm them down. A student looked up at my co-teacher and said "Miss Dianne these kids are like a bunch of bulls in a china closet."  We have all laughed about this for years!

Jenn, Hamilton, NY

Hairy Question!

I am lucky enough to have long, thick, blond hair. The girls love to brush and play with it. One day, one of our little girls, just 2 years old, asked me: "Loren, did you buy your hair at Woolworths?"

What made it even funnier was the fact that she also had long, thick, blond hair, but hers was curly too!

Loren, Plettenberg Bay, Western Cape, South Africa

Child's solution to the "picking out clothes" battle!

Child:" I'm going to be a police man when I grow up"

My response:  "That is a wonderful job.  Police help people all the time."

Child: "Oh, I don't care about that.  I want to be a police man because they get to wear the same clothes everday and their mom can't tell them to change."

Danielle from Holliston, MA

Mary Had a Little....no...Larry had a little...?!

We were singing during Circle time and I asked the kids to put up their hand if they thought of a song to sing. One little girl raised her hand and said "Can we sing Larry had a Little Man ??" It took me 5 minutes to stopping laughing !!

Miss Char from Fife, Washington

Children's Science--Most Logical!

During the Autumn (Fall) we did a lesson on the trees losing their leaves. One morning during free play a little boy came running over.  He was very excited with a guinea fowl feather in his hand.  "Look!  A bird lost it's leaf!"

One morning recently a young boy came in calling "It's true, It's true!" I asked "What is true?"

"Birds have rubber feet", he replied.

I asked how he had worked that out.

"Easy!  They sit on electric wires, tv antenia and don't get shocked!"

Belinda Ponton, Northern Cape, South Africa

The Great "Interruption"!

We were talking about rocks and soil and we demonstrated how a volcano would erupt.  For show and tell one of my 5 year olds brought a beautiful model of a volcano, made with mud, cereal, coconut and coloured liquid.  One of the other children in the class said "wow this volcano is so cool, is it going to interupt too?" 

Alison from Rustenburg, South Africa

The Magical Pumpkin

We purchased 2 pumpkins to carve with our preschoolers (one for each preschool class).  In one class, we carved the pumpkin into a very happy jack-o-lantern.  The children helped to scoop it out.  We displayed the Happy Pumpkin in our classroom.  The tray of "scoopings" was placed on a table near the uncarved pumpkin that we had waiting for the next day's class.

As the children were leaving, one little girl stopped to look at the scoopings. She noticed the other pumpkin and said, "Mommy, look!  Our pumpkin got put back together again!”  

Her Mom thought it was a very humorous version of Humpty Dumpty!

God's here?  I'm not ready!

We teach in a Christian preschool.  Our classroom is near the church's kitchen.  The church employees' offices are upstairs.  We took a tour of the church building and the children met the church employees.  They each explained their job to the children.  

The Pastor said he is a teacher and teaches about God.  The Music Director teaches people to sing and play instruments and the secretary helps support them both by writing letters, making calls, and setting up meetings.

After the tour, we returned to our classroom.  Later in the morning, one of our children was very excited when she saw someone walk past our classroom.  She began jumping up and down, pointing and calling to us all, "Everyone look!  Look!  God's here!!!!".  

After telling my co-teacher I wasn't ready for God to come yet!, we saw that the Pastor had walked by the classroom to go to the kitchen!  We explained to her that he is not God, but that he teaches about God.  She very pensively thought about that, said "Oh.  Ok."  and then waved to the Pastor and said "Hi God!".

Mom's OTHER Name!

One of our preschooler's was drawing a picture.  He asked if the teacher would write his Mom's name on it.  We had been talking with the children about their names and family member's names the week before.

The teacher replied, "Sure.  What is Mom's name?".  He, without hesistation said "Mom."  The teacher tried restating the question with "Yes.  You call her Mom.  What do other people call your Mom?".  He seemed a little confused so the teacher got more specific, "What does your Dad call your Mom?".  He replied, "Crazy!".  Preschool humor, gotta love it!

Where DID Noah get the wood to build the Ark?

It was our Bible story time, and I was telling the story of Noah to our students--a large group of preschoolers and kindergarteners. When we got to the part when Noah starts to build the ark, one little guy got very excited and was jumping out of his seat with his hand up for me to call on him. He said, "Mrs. Blease, Mrs. Blease! I know where Noah got the wood! He went to Home Depot!"  ~~~M. Blease, Hudson NH

A manger?  A hamper?  All the same when you're little!

For our Christmas pageant, the children would memorize scripture from the book of Luke. We would learn one verse at a time, and the students would say each verse by themselves and get a reward for learning it. I will never forget this little one who proudly proclaimed, "and Mary brought forth her firstborn son, and laid him in the hamper because there was no room for them in the inn" Too cute! ~~Thanks for sharing Mrs. Blease! (Hudson, NH)

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